5 things to remember when you’re dating someone exclusively.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

I’ve been dating a guy for two years. We get along great — intellectually, sexually, humor-wise, etc.

We were long-distance as he worked in another state. We talked or texted every day. We saw each other about every 6 weeks.

We never said, “I love you,” and when I brought it up, he said he had trouble expressing his feelings. His actions (driving 7 hours through snow storms to see me, etc.) said he cared so I was okay…


A 3-Part Guide to Moving on Powerfully & Finding Love Again

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

I’m getting divorced after 20+ years of marriage. Our kids are grown. I just found out he was cheating on me, and now he’s moving in with her. They’ve been together nine months.

While shocked, I’m completely over it and moving on. I don’t feel like there’s anything to say, and I feel free. So, my question is how long should I wait before I start dating? I’m in my forties and I’ve never been taken out…


Dealing with the mindfuck (and fallout) from the number of past lovers.

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

At the start of dating, my wife told me the number of men she’s had sex with was 3. She’s recently admitted that the real number is 40. How do I not despise her for this? She has been my best friend for a long time, but she has also lied a LOT about sexual things.

Richard N. — Syracuse, NY

____

Hey Richard,

Huh! I wonder what I would say to a woman who wrote in with this question:

“When I first met my husband, he asked…


What to do when the love of your life is polyamorous and you are not

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

The love of my life is a polyamorous woman. I reluctantly accept her lifestyle with the understanding that she will involve me in her encounters somehow (watching, videos, audio, etc.)

The first attempt at this was with a former FWB. She forgot to record anything because things happened too fast. It took everything I had to be ok with this situation. The one thing I asked for she ignored.

When I confront her she starts sobbing saying she’s sorry. I don’t know what to do.

David B.

____


The predictable steps you’re likely to take on your journey to finding love.

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I went on 121 first dates before I found my love. Can you even imagine? And I discovered there are ten predictable stages to dating.

Not everyone experiences all of them, or even in order. But understanding what to expect can help you navigate the tricky and sometimes insidious dating landscape.

Are you ready to dive in? Let’s do this!

#1 Ready to Date

Ready to date means you’re probably in one of two camps. You’re either…

Eager & Enthusiastic, as in you’ve finally ditched that going-nowhere-for-way-too-long relationship, or the ink…


When your husband changes his mind about being cool with no anal…

Photo by Damir Spanic on Unsplash

Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

I got married in Jan of 2021.

While we were dating, I was quick to tell him my relationship “stuff.” We covered everything from sexual needs, dealbreakers, childhood traumas, his failed marriage, our potential future kids, finances, etc. I thought we had it pretty much covered.

I was very clear about anal being a dealbreaker for me. I’ve tried it. It was painful, and not at all pleasurable. …


How to change your perspective when the relationship changes

Jen Theodore at Unsplash

Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

My boyfriend identifies as polyam and has felt this way all his adult life.

I never thought I could be happy in a polyamorous relationship because I get too triggered. Then, I accidentally fell in love with another guy (too) and now I feel like I can love more than one partner. I started seeing all the possibilities; the freedom, less pressure because I don’t have to be his everything, extra emotional support, open communication, etc.

I told him we should go for it, so he got back…


Dating is hard enough, can’t we all come to the table with a little game?

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

I’ve read your book a few times now I’ve done a few of your courses, and finally had the focus, energy, and intention to get online a few weeks ago.

I’ve had several guys email me and I’ve also emailed a few men with about a 75% response rate. But I find that many of the emails I receive from seemingly interested guys tend to leave me dead in the water. They don’t…


How to Bring Up the Future of Children When You’re Dating

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy

I’m dating a guy who says he wants a family but won’t say specifically that he wants kids. This is confusing to me. What should I make of this?

Tiff F. — Oakland, CA

____

Hey Tiff,

What you should make of that is that he wants a family.

But I get your point.

There’s a whole lot of “new normal” out there, so a “family” could mean just about anything: Having a child or adopting seven…


What to do when you’re having a hard time letting go of bad behaviors in relationships

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Ask Wendy: Dating, Sex & Relationship Advice for the Bold

Hey Wendy,

I’ve been with my boyfriend for over three years. He cheated on me when we first got together, not physically, but emotionally. He was cheating with different women by flirting and talking with them at the start of our relationship. They knew he had a girlfriend, but still. I broke up with him, then took him back.

Fast forward to now, he’s a completely different man. He is honest and we have…

Wendy Newman

Dating, Sex & Relationship Expert and Author of 121 First Dates (Simon & Schuster). Over 70,000 women trust Wendy’s advice, tools, & experience. WendySpeaks.com

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